Beers, Whips, and Carrots

In goal setting, you'll either drink with your friends or suffer alone

I didn't post in April.

That kind of bugs me to be honest. But at the same time, I know I need to be good with how April shook out, which included traveling for two out of four weeks. The point is that you need to set goals and then hold them with an open hand.

Photo by Yutacar on Unsplash

As leaders, we all too often set goals as a whip or a carrot. We use our goals as a whip when we use them to self-flagellate over missed deadlines and unmet expectations. Our goals become instruments of self-torture when they aren't met, like some kind of sick monasticism that turned legit piety into religions of self-worship.¹ But we can also use our goals as carrots on a stick. We hold them out in front to drive our ass² selves on, constantly pursuing a result that won’t ever materialize. The third option is to set goals, swing for the fence, and then drink a beer with friends whether or not you make it.

Choose option three.

Reading

I'm reading a good bit on biblical masculinity these days (i.e., what the Bible has to say about manhood). It is a constant reading category of mine along with war memoirs, essayists, poetry, systematic theology, and biographies³.

Writing

As for writing, I'm trying out 750 Words. For most of you who know how I write, this may seem like a huge departure from my longhand sensibilities. Maybe it is; maybe it isn't. The concept is that you write 750 words every day and the site keeps up with your progress and a few other fun metrics. I'm constantly experimenting with writing habits.⁴

The overall point is that I’m convinced that writing, like most of life, is bricolage.

Coaching

I continue to coach some of the greatest guys I could ever hope to call friends. Seriously, I think my clients are changing and will change the world. That I get a front-row seat to what they're doing is pretty amazing. I'll break the 250-hour mark this week for coaching. I'm pretty excited about being halfway toward my PCC.

Up Next

My next post will be a post for writers. The number of times I get requests for books and resources about writing is enormous. I'm finally going to put it down in one post. Hopefully, it won't take a month for me to write.

But either way, beers with friends over carrots and whips, gents.

1. If you think that is over the top, then you're not a leader. If you know, then you know.

2. I had a conversation with one of my sons recently about the use of this word. Ass is a great, older term that should be revived in its proper usage. Rather than what you sit on, we should use it in its more common, older use to describe the stubborn animal we usually call a donkey.

3. Teddy Roosevelt and Lyndon Johnson most recently. I’m not quite sure how I landed on presidents.

4. By the way, read this book if you're interested in the habits of writers and artists. The tl;dr version is: amphetamines are bad while daily schedules are good.